Article on ShinMin Newspaper

The news article about my beauty pageant on ShinMin chinese newspaper. It mainly describes the journey on how I raised my premature firstborn who was diagnosed with the risk of learning disability but turned out to be gifted. Click HERE if you like to learn more about his story. 

The article also talks about my amazing 30kg weight-lost transformation before I won the runner up title for Mrs World Singapore pageant. The photo in the article was taken when I hit almost 80kg, my heaviest weight ever. Click HERE to read more about my transformation. 

Our Happy Little Suns - Kyrian , the second child after my first preemie

It was nearly one and a half year later when I held that distinctly double lines on my pregnancy kit again, staring at it in disbelief. Unlike the reaction of my first pregnancy, this time my senses were pervaded by an uncomfortable premonition of fear. I remembered that dryness in my throat and churning in my stomach, and the very first words I uttered were.. "oh shit." And amusingly ... I  called hubby after sending him the photo of my positive pregnancy kit and his first words were almost similar to mine.. "SHITTT....!"

To be honest, my second pregnancy was unplanned. In fact ,the Hubs and I have even talked about stopping at one child, especially after we have maxed out our strength, energy and finance on our firstborn preemie. If one already had a premature birth, there's an increased risk of having another premature baby. At that moment, we still have this phobia of the next one putting us through the same horrendous experience.

After collecting myself together, I tried to look at the positive side. All the while I was rather struggled over my inability to carry my child to full-term. The feeling of being"short-changed" by the birth of my first born preemie. It seems to have robbed me of the experience of a healthy long term pregnancy, and the precious first few hours or days bonding with the baby, the taking of photographs in my ward , or just basking in the glory of our newly-created family.

So I'm guessing God's plan is to compensate me with another chance to achieve the experience that I once thought I could have...and that's unless my next one managed to stay comfy in my womb for at least 37 weeks.

There were a lot of precautions to take, such as the increased multiple times of checkups at the gynae's and extra medication prescribed to strengthen my cervix. Once I was near the end of my second trimester, I was put to full bed-rest at home. My mom and hubby succeeded in fattening me as they were determined to see a good number for the second baby weight this time. I was held captive like a goose, being forced feed up to 5 times a day. Without any exercise (I was even forbid to climb the stairs at home.) and the crazy intake of their so-call nutritious food, my weight rapidly increased like nobody's business. I gained a total of 27 kgs for this pregnancy and continued to gain more even during my confinement period

(I shall talk more on my weight lost transformation in another post.)

Fortunately, my second child managed to reached full-term, hitting 38 weeks and 3 days. This time I was determined to achieve a natural birth delivery, despite my gynae's disapproval though. In the end, BabyK was smoothly delivered naturally with epidural within 8 hours, and achieved a good weight of 3.3kg.  Most importantly, I witnessed his first cry , I cuddled him, I kissed his cheeks, I latched him for breastfeeding...all these immediately right after his birth. It seems that I've finally gotten a psychological closure. Now, I've got a pleasant birth story to share too.

(The first meeting of Rboy and his baby brother.)

My second boy is named Kyrian, which is the greek word for Lord. In truth, I goggled the name Kyrian and the first photo that caught my attention was this freaking yandao model with the name Kyrian. And that confirm my decision to name my second boy, Kyrian.

 BabyK has an entirely opposite personality from his older brother. He is much more active and alert, and was easily enchanted and humoured by the things around him. Yes, he giggles all the time, especially when interacting with Rboy.

BabyK was also a very vocal baby and his first few comprehensible words were at 7 months old. Before he turns two, he can speak in clear short sentence like , "Hello, my name is Kyrian. I am 2 years old.", and my all time favourite phrase, "Mummy, didi love love you."

 At times my darling babyK can be quite handful, but overall he is really an affectionate snuggly little baby who loves to throw you lots of surprise cuddles and kisses.

Furthermore, he is my favourite photography model for showcasing our kids' OOTD (outfit of the day).

I've to shamelessly say that my son is such a charmer~~~~~

He loves dressing up, enjoys posing, takes instructions very well, loves the camera and the camera loves him haha!

So it didn't take long to make the decision to sign him up for modelling this year, hopefully to gain more exposure and most importantly, doing what he is good at. We are really looking forward for his first casting!

(His modelling portfolio shoot at 22 months old)

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Lastly, I shall end this blog entry with a photo of my two precious sunshines in my life. This photo is taken last year from BabyK's one year old outdoor photo-shoot session.

Embarking on this journey of motherhood is full of unforeseen challenges but trust me, it is tough only at the best of times. The payoff can be fantastic and so surprisingly awesome that it helps keep my momentum going on, especially during physically taxing and emotionally draining days.

Moreover, there is nothing that leaves me more in awe than witnessing my sunshine boys present me with new wonders every single day. I treasure each and every moment with my heart overflowing with gratitude. Well, I hope this blog will touch the hearts of other moms who share the same thoughts and know that we are all on the same boat. As well as prospective moms-to-be who are looking forward to embark on this wonderful journey, also the curious passer-by who happen to find motherhood astonishing and fascinating, and needs more convincing haha.

Yes, it is life's blessing, to be a mother, so just enjoy it to the fullest.

Our Happy Little Suns - Reagan , my firstborn son

The purpose of creating this blog is to document the beautiful footprints of our happy sunshine boys and to share our exhilarating parenting journey. I thought I should then dedicate a post to them, introducing my two precious little sunbeams in my life. 

My first sunshine in my life is named Reagan, it means "little king" (he is still ruling  ...). I usually pen him as Rboy in my blog. Rboy is the child that was born too early. At my 28th week of pregnancy, my blood pressure hit over 200, I bled profusely , vomited uncontrollably from the intense pain in my abdomen, followed by a minor seizure attack. The doctor explained that my placenta had detached itself and there was sign of fetal distress. Baby's heartbeat was dropping alarmingly and they had no choice but to remove him from my womb to save his life and mine. Very quickly, I was wheeled into the operating theatre for an emergency c-section under GA. Pre-eclampsia was what they suspected I had, a life threatening pregnancy condition which affects 2-8% of all pregnant women.

My baby boy was delivered with no signs of life. He was neither moving nor breathing. The medical team rushed him to the NICU , trying their best to resuscitate him.

We never forget the doctor's exact words , "He is a miracle baby."

My baby won the first round of battle... which is to stay alive.

(Reagan 's 1st day at the NICU)

Rboy is a 29weeks preemie, weighing 1.2kg, which dropped to only 950grams the day after. 

To witness my baby boy painfully tangled in all these wires and tubes was truly heart-breaking.

His tiny ribs were expanding and contracting in a sickening manner, gasping for every breath in great difficulty...but I was not allow to carry or to comfort my baby. The only thing I can do is to watch, wept...and pray...I never felt so helpless in my life.

The sense of guilt and worry got my anxiety soaring high. The prolonged uncertainty and fear of having a struggling preemie in the NICU is inevitable. I was totally not prepared for this.

The next couple of months was an emotional roller coaster ride for us. A melancholic way to begin our first-time parenthood journey. Although Reagan looks so tiny and fragile, he was a strong warrior and fought hard to overcome all life-threatening medical conditions that came his way. During his two months stay in the NICU, he was diagnosed with lungs infection, bleeding in the brain and a hole in his heart. We can do nothing but to pray, and yes we prayed hard..every minute and every single day.

Miraculously ....he recovered from all of the above conditions. Doctors have no explanation . "Sometimes it just happened. " they said.

Beyond the traumatic experience, came the triumphant. We waited for 59 enduring days before we get to cuddle our precious baby boy back home with us.

I learnt that prematurity can have long term side effects in life. Premature babies who survived are at risk of impaired cognitive skills which includes developmental delays and learning disabilities. Comparing to their full-term counterparts, they also face higher odds of chronic health issues and lower immunity.

Therefore I made the most apparent decision to become a stay-at-home-mom. We had too much lost time...now I just want to bond and spend every minute with my baby. Equipped with an early education background, I wasted no time to bond with my boy, exposed him to lots of sensory play and right-brain stimulation. Rboy was a very calm and quiet baby. His physical/motorskills milestones were lagging behind even after his adjusted age. It was until nearly 2 years old then he learned to walk independently.

On the other hand , we also noticed that Rboy had an astounding attention span and was very keen to learn and explore. He grew very fond of flashcards and attained very strong interest in alphabets and numbers. It was until around the age of 13 months then we found out that he could easily recognise alphabets, including differentiating all upper and lower case letters. He understood numbers and its quantity, as well as most colours and shapes, even the more complex ones like rhombus, sphere, pentagon, octagon ,cylinder etc. The most amazing discovery was that Reagan could recognise and read words at the age of around one year old. It was not easy to pronounce the words very well at his age, but he could sign to us or point correctly at every word we asked for. I tried my best to keep up with his speed of learning by engaging him in more challenging "words play" which he loves so much.

Before he turned 2 years old,  he could identify any random words and able to read , pick up and form sentences.

With no knowledge of phonics, he was still able to "decode" or "breakdown" words and read them accurately. It didn't take long for him to turn into an independent reader by the age of 3. Picking up any children book and reading it by himself became a very easy feat to him. And now, his current favorite stunt is unlocking our cellphones to read our messages , or to log into YouTube to type in the names of the videos that he wants to search for.

(Reagan at 3 years old)

Soon, through the encouragement from one of his teachers, we sent him to a child psychologist who put him through the Stanford-Binet V, an internationally recognised IQ assessment test. We wanted to understand more on his intellectual capabilities and learning, as well as the ways on how we can support him further. The report showed that Reagan scored within the top 1% and was placed under the gifted range. With his IQ report, he was successfully accepted by Mensa at the age of 3.

Rboy has grown to have a character of his own. He has never really been an active child and usually prefers to watch and observe his surroundings, but neither is he a withdrawn boy. He speaks with enthusiasm about things he loves, like trains and railway tracks or his favorite movies that he watched. He also possessed the traits of a perfectionist and has high expectation of himself. This leads to frustrations most of the time though. He has a fear of not getting things done in the perfect way he wants and would then choose not to attempt. It was obvious that he has an issue of facing failure, which is not supposed to happen at this young age. Rboy also prefers the company of older children and adults and often have very few words with kids at his age. Therefore, confidence and social skill are something I like him to improve on.

It's still very amazing to watch our tiny fragile little baby grow into a boy with so much love and personality. Witnessing him once fight for survival in the NICU is an unforgettable memory in this lifetime of ours. This experience also put things into perspective for us as we learned to even more cherish the value of life. We are always reminded of the heartache we felt in our journey to be with him, which made our heart filled with so much gratitude. We are so blessed to have our Rboy, our beautiful bundle of joy. 

Please hop on to the next entry here on my second baby sunshine, BabyK .